Triggers

I’m a freshman in college, and I’m living on campus. I’m quickly realizing that that is a huge mistake. I’m surrounded by triggers 24/7.

I get it. It’s your first time living alone. Why not party? Drink, smoke, have the time of your life.

However, I can’t stand being around it. I makes me think of my dad and how sick he is. And how addiction can completely destroy someone.

I’ve always said that when I grow up I’m never going to drink. For as long as I can remember, even in elementary school.

Then high school came around and I was like fuck that. I drank, and had my fun.

But now even being around other people drinking is such a trigger. It makes me anxious, puts me on edge.

So now here I am, living in a college dorm. Surrounded by people partying. And I’m sober, and can’t handle being around any of it.

I’m trying to figure out if moving Home is the right thing. But wherever I go, alcohol will be there. It’s not a trigger I can avoid. I need to learn to live with it.

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